Thursday, February 1, 2018

The Plan


I sometimes feel like my life is like
a slow dance.
For me my art has been the timing and the rhythm
that allows me to show what's
in my head and create it with my hands.
I slip in and out of the materials I love to touch.
I experienced clay, then sculpture, then my beloved fabric.
Yes, there is a texture to my fabric,
because I placed it there.

Now my mind and art are the partners.
One is graceful and one can barely keep a beat.
But they are learning from each other.
The confidence of the creation is energizing.

So why am I so sad?
Because each failure left its
 impression.
Each angry word made me cry.
All the insults made me ball up and
want to hide.
Feeling unwanted by so many,
feeling shamed by those around me
caused me to turn within.

Who could protect my fears?
Had anyone notice my darkest thoughts?
Didn't you notice when I sat alone?
I was smart enough, but I didn't feel it.
Those emotions were raw.

Easy enough to say that is all
in the past and move on,
but my "foundation" was cracked.

Now, I strive to build "me" from the ground up.
I will need to be the architect, the engineer and the 
creative mind to invigorate this new landmark.
I will create a new me using my own specifications.

I will not follow-the PLAN--- I will lead it.

Fire and Ice by Cathy Jeffers
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#life plan  #goals  #aging  #artist  #planning

#community  #life   #quilt   #emotions

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